Has anyone seen an episode of SNL lately? Saturday night I was home hanging out with a couple friends and we decided to do a shot every time one of the skits made us laugh. Well we all ended up sober that night. I kid you not I don’t remember laughing the entire time watching that terrible show and it makes me really sad because I have always been a huge fan of SNL especially during the Chris Farley, Adam Sandler, and Will Ferrell days.

 Who the hell is Andy Samberg and why is he on his third season of SNL when the first two seasons sucked!  I loved Bill Hader in SuperBad if you didn’t see the movie he plays a police officer who lives vicariously through the life of  Fogul or better know as McLoven, but I don’t think he’s worthy either of being a SNL character. You see the skits and you compare them to the skits you use to watch with Will Ferrell and they just don’t get into their character as much. There for its not believable and there for its not funny. It also really takes the fun out of any kind of drinking game you’re trying to do.

  Lazer Cat was there big featured skit from Saturday night which was sooo horrible it was almost to funny. Christopher Walken was guest starring and was a huge part of this skit. Please take a chance to check it out for yourself right here. Let me know what you think.    

Well I see that know one was successful at cracking my secret code from last week. To all of you who attempted it you all pretty much failed me. Its fine though ill keep my 2 slices of Pizza and a coke. In case you where wondering the answer was “G”

Now I know that sometimes I come off as…..what’s the word I’m looking for? Im gonna go with creative. Something that’s been drawing my attention lately is slow moving cars driving down East Ave. Not just East Ave but I guess you can say everywhere. The people or thing driving these rusted duct tape vehicles cannot be good people. They come off as looking for trouble, looking for something or someone to give candy to. I can be 100% honest right now and say im worried for some kids who have to walk two miles back and forth to school everyday. If a creepy brown van and lets go with the color brown because it’s a dull color. If a creepy brown van pulls up and asks you if you need a ride somewhere you say “NO” know matter what. Parents are very intelligent and tell there kids all the time to just say “NO” regardless of how awesome the candy is that someone is offering you. Just say “NO” unless you can get them to give you your favorite candy in bulk.

I hate vans with holes in the side of them covered and rust and have know windows. I understand some people are less fortunate but I also understand that some people are just scum bags. If you’re holding up your rear bumper and tail pipe with a piece of tape than God Bless you!!!! Its only obvious that good things are waiting down the road for you. EWWW wait my favorite is the family of four who roles down 490 E in style with a 93 Ford Aero star with the 18” rims, you my friends know how to stay flossin….for Shizzle my dizzle. So I ask all of you know matter what age to please be careful and just say “NO” to creepy ass strangers in horrendous looking vehicles. Have a good one!     

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        Im hungry! Those are the words most of my family members, friends, and colleagues hear me utter not daily but hourly. Im a huge fan of junk food and in the last twenty eight hours I have not had a single cup of blue cheese, chips, soda, or any kind of fast food you can think of. Im detoxing my body right now and it sucks. My goal is to hit the 170 lbs mark in about 3 weeks before I leave for my best friends wedding In the Bahamas. I got about 17 lbs to go. That seems like a reasonable number for a 24 yr whose about 5’7, 5’8.

       Yesterday I had stuffed myself with nothing but vegetables and protein. I think the reason I felt so sick is because my body was thinking I was going to deepfry all of these tastless healthy foods but that wasn’t the case. You ever eat a lot of vegetables to the point where you kind of feel nautios but you know for 100% you wont throw up. That just seems bizare to throw up from to much vegetables doesn’t it? Yeah well I almost made it happen. I would have been sooo proud of myself.

      Anyways if you got any advice on how im going to be able to get through this 3 week period on nothing but vegetables help me out PLEASE. I will admit I rather eat healthy any day than exercise my ass off. I mean lets be honest it’s a proven fact that dieting is 90% of loosing weight. You can exercise for 30min a day and do a little dieting on the side but its just not going to be as effective. I love food and not just any food im talking about BAD FOOD, FAST FOOD, FRIED FOOD, GARBAGE FOOD. These are a few of my favorite things.

     OOO KFC with your golden fried thighs and drumsticks. You melt in my mouth not in my hand. You know you outdid yourself  last week Mr. Taco Bell with your delicious supreme soft taco. Eating you behind the dumpster @ the mall at 1:45am has never tasted sooo good. Dont even get me started Ronlad…you know I cant just eat two Big-Macs withouth coming back for a third. Pizza-Hut, what can I say ooo my dear Pizza-Hut we have had sooo many memories together. You stole my heart the day you decided to stuff your crust with cheese. I will miss you all soo much for the three weeks your not in my tummy. I Love you

-Moose xoxox

I went to the mall this weekend and won’t be descriptive of which one I was at but something boggled my mind, something I just couldn’t put my finger on.  I was walking by one of the clothing department stores when I noticed a wall of art…but not just any ordinary wall of art. I’m talking about a collage of crap. Yes children’s art work, im sure you’ve seen it, its pictures of flowers with eyes or a bunch of trees that have wheels on it. I’m disappointed in the parents who refuse to put a stop in saving their children the embarrassment.

This is not good art work and if you tell your kids that the picture of the castle they just drew which really looks like a long finger with a sharp nail coming out of it is beautiful well your not only lying and being dishonest to them but your lying to yourself. Is that what you really want… for people to sit there and be confused and not know if the picture that your little Billy just created is a picture of a horse or just a giant giraffe with wheels? Barns are not Green! I have never seen a green barn in my entire life what are you thinking Kyle: 6 from Penfield.

First off I can probably run faster than any of the kids who thought it was ok to post that horrendous art on the wall. I am also a much better drawer. I took the liberty of posting some of the art work that I saw. Im sure you can see just how terrible it is. The picture directly above is one that I had painted in my spare time. Its called “Tiger in a church”  I love this piece, I had decided to go with a light orange to bring out the hue on the Tiger’s fur. As you can see the picture on the right is a bunch of crap. Its just skribbles on a piece of paper that doesnt represent anything. I give it an “F” Terrible!